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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 25, 2007 12:54:28 GMT -5
8/20 (8) 8/21 (7) 8/22 (2) 8/23 (1) 8/24 (1) 8/25 (1)
A couple of tempting days back at the beginning of last week but I'm okay. Feeling very good today planning on a great weekend with my wife. Her due date is a little over a week away and I'm trying to make sure that she is getting lots of rest. I'm very excited to meet my son.
Life will continue to be busy over the next few months but I will try to come to the support board from time to time to check in. Thanks to those of you that stop by my journal. I'm grateful of your support.
I feel like I've come a long way since the end of April, just five months. I don't wish to return to my old behaviors and false beliefs or to the filth.
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 28, 2007 20:25:15 GMT -5
8/26 (1), 8/27 (1), 8/28 (1) Feeling very Strong and grateful today. Thank you Lord for everything that you give us. Your name is above all. Thanks be to God! I could not have made it this far without the Lord and my wife's support. Also those of you here on this support board.
I've not been coming back to the support board as much as I did in the first few months. And when I do come back I only read and post in certain areas. I find that if I read to many post in the general or recovery threads that I begin to think more about P. So I only read and post in my journal, accountability circle, and a few threads on the recovery sections. I've also been keeping so busy that I don't have the time to come to the support board very much. But this support board has been a God sent, it's the first place that I found when I started looking for help. Thank you to all of you here on this support board and thanks to Wes for starting this site. I'm so grateful, Thanks again.
I pray that everyone on this support board find what they are looking for and that they find success in their recovery, in Christ name. Thanks be to God!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by Mountain on Sept 1, 2007 1:55:46 GMT -5
wanttochange024,
Thanks for stopping by in my Journal. I have not had a lot so say lately but I am making progress. I appreciate the encouragement and support.
May the Lord bless you and your family.
Mountain.
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Post by wanttochange024 on Sept 2, 2007 11:34:34 GMT -5
8/29 (10), 8/30 (4), 8/31(2), 9/1(1), 9/2(1)
Had a very tempting day last Wed. but I'm okay now. I still seem to have a very tempting day every week to ten days or so. I've been working of my lust for women that I see out during the day. And I do well for a week or so and then the lustful thoughts are harder to keep in check. This process has been repeating itself for some time now and I'm not sure how to move past it. I'll continue to work on my lustful thoughts and pray that I will overcome this step in my recovery.
Looking forward to a great month - September. The heat is starting to break and I will become very busy with work and family this month. I will not have much time to come to the support board and read and post. However, I think that it helps me to avoid reading to many post. Sometime a post here can start me thinking about things that I don't need to think about. I notice that many members take breaks from coming to the board. I too need a break from time to time to focus on my recovery and my life. I'll always return to check in from time to time to see how some of you are doing and to pass along some info. about my own recovery.
I think back to several months a go and think about how far I've come from my old behaviors and perceptions. I know that I've still got some issues to work on and a long road ahead as I continue my recovery. But I've come a long way and I feel much better about who I am now. P (filth) is a path straight to death, straight down to hell.
Lord, give us all the strength to overcome the temptations of the devils filth, give us faith, love and wisdom to think good thoughts, I ask in Christ name. Amen.
Thanks be to God!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by daveb on Sept 2, 2007 14:04:40 GMT -5
Hi Wanttochange024, Well, I started day 1 again this past midnight. Day 1 is going fine. I am learning so much about my addiction and know that I can go 100 days porn free. The first 60 days will show me that I am on the right path. You are in my thoughts and I am glad to hear you are clean. You are an inspiration to me and everyone here. This is not impossible for me. I need to get into a flow and rhythm of life and never think I am out of the woods. You are right in that music can help me through this process. It is all up hill from here. Have a great September. Take care my friend... Dave B.
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Post by MrOuch on Sept 2, 2007 22:02:00 GMT -5
wtc024,
Dwelling on lustful thoughts is the problem. It is inevitable that somewhere in our daily lives we will come across some image or situation that will tempt us toward lustful thoughts. Our world is filled with filth. Our culture is inundated with it. So avoiding all temptation is nearly impossible. What we have to do is steel our resolve and prepare for the onslaught.
You sound like you're doing great. Keep up the good work.
MrOuch
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Post by wanttochange024 on Sept 3, 2007 15:30:01 GMT -5
daveb and MrOuch, Thanks so much for your kind words and support. This means so much to me. Thanks.
Feeling good today trying to stay away from the TV, it seems that every channel that I turn to shows something that could lead to lustful thoughts. What is our culture coming to?
I must continue to prepare myself for the onslaught of tempting visual images that I will encounter each and everyday. I am stronger that this filth and I will not let it drag me back down.
I will not except the perception that our culture pushes on us. I will change my perception to what is true and good. Life is much better without the filth of our culture. Avoid the filth when you can and do not dwell on lustful thoughts. Always think good thoughts!
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Sept 3, 2007 17:05:30 GMT -5
"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."
Matthew 5: 27-28
Lord I ask you to come into my heart, make my heart pure, give me wisdom, love and faith, forgive me my sins, forgive me of looking at women lustfully, forgive me for committing adultery, I ask these things in Christ name. Amen.
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by daveb on Sept 15, 2007 16:51:47 GMT -5
Dear wanttochange024, I love that quote. Thank you for posting it. As a person, I want to be remembered as loving and caring. Not a person who is evil and lusts. Thank you for being with me wanttochange024. I am with you too. We are all here for each other, even when we fall. I am on day 2. I feel o.k. and I will take life one day at a time. I will think good thoughts and stay away from the filth. I do not like this culture in the United States either. I do not watch television anymore and am staying away from the radio too. T.V. is all about image. I am not about that. I will help to make a good culture. I will stay away from porn. I will treat every woman with respect. I will treat every person with respect. I am with you wtc024. You are my hero... daveb
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Post by wanttochange024 on Sept 16, 2007 16:56:14 GMT -5
Thank you daveb, you are in my prayers my friend. Stay strong.
Just over a week ago my wonderful wife gave birth to our son. I've been so very busy that I haven't had a chance to come to the support board. I'm feeling very good and the birth of my son has changed my perception of a lot of things in this life. He had a rough start as he entered this world and it scared the hell out of me. It made me think about what is truly important in this life. It's not the filth that brought me to this site. Life is too short to waste even a moment thinking about filth. There are too many great things that God has given us to waste time on P. I seem to have better control of my lustful thoughts. Lately I'm focused on my family and my job and my music. I pray that I will be a good example for my son as he grows and that I can lead him in the light of the Lord.
It will be some time before I find the time to come back to post in my journal. The next couple of months I plan on focusing all of my energy on my wife and son and my work. I want to say thank you to all of you that stop by my journal to read and post. It means a lot to me and I hope that what I've written in this journal helps. May God be with you.
God, make my heart pure, fill me with love and wisdom and most of all faith, I ask in Christ name. Amen.
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by wanttochange024 on Sept 23, 2007 18:30:37 GMT -5
Just a quick check in. Feeling very good, a bit sleepy, but good. The past two weeks have been wonderful and I'm feeling very different about my life and the direction that I want to go. The past couple of days I've had a few thoughts try to slip into my mind but I realized this and redirected them to more positive and uplifting thoughts. This has made me realize that I am not out of the woods yet. So I will stay on top of the old thoughts and behaviors and continue to work the new thoughts and behaviors. I like the new thoughts and behaviors. I feel more like myself with these thoughts and behaviors. My perception of life is changing and I'm so happy.
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D
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Post by Valjean on Sept 24, 2007 6:09:07 GMT -5
Hi WTC024 I'm really glad to hear you're happy and keeping your guard up. A sure way to success I feel! Your son is truly lucky to have you as a father. Valjean
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Post by wanttochange024 on Sept 26, 2007 21:12:08 GMT -5
I've had some stronger tempting thoughts the past couple of days, withdrawal, you never know when it's going to show up. I'm okay now but I was very tempted to view some sexy women and then I started to think about my family and how long I've worked to get to this point. And to give in would put me back and would make it harder the next time that I'm tempted.
Away from me, old thoughts and behaviors. I'm not that person any more. I have new thoughts and behaviors. My perception has changed. I now live in the truth, forever more.
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D
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Post by wanttochange024 on Oct 8, 2007 18:05:30 GMT -5
Just checking in and bringing my journal back up to the top. I'm still having some tempting thoughts every once in a while, but I seem to be keeping things under control. I would just like for the tempting thoughts to come to an end. After viewing the filth for so many years it may take years before this will ever happen. However, I not going to give in, I will continue to fight the good fight. I'm not going to go back to viewing that filth. I do not need that crap in my life. I have to many great things happening in my life right now to revert back to the filth of P.
I've had a few days off and have been able to spend some time with my wife and new child. It's been very busy but it has been some of the best days of my life. I can only imagine how many great days there are to come. Some people think that their best days have pasted them by, I know that mine are yet to come.
Imagine all the people, living life in peace. Give peace a chance. John Lennon birthday is Tuesday.
Thank you John, for all of the great songs of hope and love.
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D
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Post by wanttochange024 on Oct 21, 2007 11:55:59 GMT -5
It's been about 10 days or so since my last post. Things have been very busy with my family and work. Staying busy seem to help keep my mind from thinking about P. However, I have had some tempting thoughts as of late. Trying to stay on top of these thoughts and not let them lead to a slip or relapse. I have not had time to come to the support board to check in with anyone or to write in my journal. I still spend time thinking about my addiction and how to keep thing in check, but I'm concerned that I might not be doing enough to stay on track with my recovery. I should try to find more time to come and post in my journal, but I don't know when I'll have more time. May be in a couple of weeks I can begin to find a moment here and there to post.
Still on track, but concerned.
Thinking Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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