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Post by Valjean on Jul 15, 2007 17:24:02 GMT -5
Hi wtc, glad to see you well Stay strong brother, I'm loving the John Donne! Valjean
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 16, 2007 9:35:52 GMT -5
Thanks Valjean!
Yesterday was a good day 7/15 (1)
As I've re-read my journal from this month, I find I'm more focused on my relationship with the Lord. The open line of communication with the Lord is the answer, I think, to being successful in my recovery.
Stay focused this week and the next couple of weeks should be easier as I stay busy at work.
Call upon Christ for a pure heart and for good thoughts.
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 18, 2007 15:29:53 GMT -5
Lots of tempting thoughts today, I've struggled over the last couple of days. Trying to stay busy, just wanted to stop by the journal and make a short post.7/16 (8), 7/17 (10), 7/18 (10) Now I'm going to get off this computer!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 19, 2007 16:55:56 GMT -5
Feeing much better today, the past few days I've had a hard time with tempting thoughts. These thoughts seem to start when I see a sexy women while out running around or doing something. I've got to work on looking away and not let the sight of some woman drag tempting thoughts into my mind.
I'm going back into my journal and work on tempting thoughts and lust. I plan on re-writing some of my ideas and thoughts on this matter. Right now this seem to be the biggest problem for me in my recovery. I'll post more on this later.
However, I've been doing well at staying away from the computer when I'm having strong tempting thoughts. The easy access on the computer makes it too dangerous to be around. It would be too easy to fall back into the old behaviors.
The viewing of P for so many years has screwed up my perception of women. During the summer months (right now), women tend to wear fewer clothes and show more than I need to see. This sometimes leads me to my old false beliefs that something could happen with this woman, not that I want that, I don't. But the years of viewing P has twisted my perception. I must also work on changing my perception of women, so that I don't continue to have these lustful thoughts tempting me to fall back into my old behaviors.
I WILL CHANGE MY PERCEPTION OF WOMEN! I WILL STOP MY LUSTFUL VIEWING OF WOMEN! I WILL THINK GOOD THOUGHTS!
I will focus on these things and make myself stronger for the fights to come.
Thank you Lord for this P free day. Today is a good day to be P free. Everyday is a good day to be P free.
Lord forgive me my lustful thoughts and give me the strength to think good thoughts.
THINK GOOD THOUGHTS!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 20, 2007 10:28:09 GMT -5
7/19 (2) Feeling good today and yesterday was a good day.
I finding that I need to work on my false perception of women so that I can deal with my lustful perception of women.
Things to work on in review of my journal---
I must take responsibility for my addiction, the choice that I've made.
Don't fall to complacency!
Don't return to false beliefs!
Be aware of the easy availability of P, stay away from the computer when I'm feeling tempted.
Remember that you are strong, you have done many things in your life that took strength.
Remember that you can stop viewing P, count the number of days that you have stooped (more than 100...), count the number of reasons you have to stop (they are many...).
Remember how many people understand how hard your working on your addiction (over 5,000 members of the support board). My wife understand and is grateful for the hard work that you've done on your recovery.
Remember that these old addictive behaviors are not strong unless you give them strength. These are the behaviors that you want to remove from your life. This is not who you are or who you want to be. + Remember the things you could lose if you give into these behaviors. The love of your life. The chance to be a good father. The chance to live the life God wants for you. My job, livelihood, identity EVERYTHING!
*Remember that you have many learned false perceptions that you are working on. Remember how long you've had these false perceptions. Do not let these false perceptions change your true perceptions of what is truly real in life.
Remember if you give in to temptation (or any thing that leads to temptation) you are giving up on recovery ( if you give in this time it makes it harder the next time), you are giving up on your relationships with God and your wife, you are giving up on being a strong father, you are giving up on life. DON'T GIVE UP!
Recognition of withdrawal symptoms is critical to influence your ability to fight off a relapse.
Avoid the acts of the sinful nature and search out the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Life is to short to give in to temptation of filth and false perceptions. Live a true life!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 25, 2007 21:03:12 GMT -5
7/20 (1), 7/21 (1). 7/22 (1), 7/23 (2), 7/24 (1), 7/25 (2) It's been almost a week since my last post. The information above show that I've had a very good week. I've been very busy the last week, so busy that I haven't even had time to come on line to check out the support board. This is a good thing, but I do find myself thinking about those of you on this support board.
I'm feeling very strong today and have felt very good the past week. I'll be very busy over these next two weeks as well. So I want have very much time to post. I'll try to make time to post this weekend and some time next week.
It feels great to be busy enough to keep my mind from thinking about the filth the brought me to this support board. I'm spending time each day reading and praying. Keeping the line of communication open with God. I feel like this is the answer to my recovery. In the past week, I only had a couple of thoughts about P. I find that my biggest problem is still lust. I have had to keep myself in check about looking at women lustfully. Still this has not been as bad as it was a couple of weeks a go.
Thanks be to God for His love and His words. With the Lords help I can overcome anything. The Lord gives me strength to fight this battle. My love for God gives me the will to stay on the right path to a full recovery. Even in times of temptation the Lord is with me, helping me to make the right choice. Thanks be to God.
Make good choices! Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 29, 2007 14:22:41 GMT -5
7/26 (2), 7/27 (1), 7/28 (2), 7/29 (2) Feeling good the past few days, staying very busy. If I keep myself busy I tend not to think about things that would lead to relapse. So, I've been keeping myself busy when not at work by doing extra things to keep my house in good order (yard work, little projects ...). My wife will bring my son into the world with the next five weeks or so. There are many things that must be done before he arrives. I'm getting very excited about him, I want to see what he looks like, what color is his hair? ... I want to be a great father, I don't want to have filth around the house when he begins to explore and looking through things. I would hate for him to find some P like I found my father's P. I will not let this happen! I'm so grateful to be feeling as well as I feel today. No P in my life. This is the way that life was meant so be lived. Thank God, for everything that I've gained and for showing me all that I have to gain. I will continue to work on making my life better, there by making my wife, son to be and everyone around me lives better. Looking forward to a great week. I'll be busy again this week so I'll try to check in later in the week. Ain't Life Grand. Think Good Thoughts! wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Jul 31, 2007 21:29:56 GMT -5
7/30 (3), 7/31 (2) Still feeling good, fighting off some tempting thoughts with the help of the Lord. I still working on my lust. Trying not to look at women in this way at all. I will get to the point where I don't have to worry about lust. It will take time, but I will get there.
Still staying busy this week and I need to get off line and go to bed because tomorrow is another busy day. I've been doing good lately but I do need to come back and look through my journal. I've been so busy that I haven't had time to do that in a couple of weeks. I don't want to slip into my old behaviors. I've still got to stay focused on my recovery.
Thanks be to God for every moment that I live a life free of the filth that brought me to where I am now. With love for the Lord I can reach my goals of recovery and become a better man.
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 4, 2007 18:18:06 GMT -5
8/1 (1), 8/2 (1), 8/3 (1), 8/4 (1) Feeling very strong, with God's blessings I'll continue to be strong enough to fight off the false beliefs and behaviors that brought me to this point. God's love overcomes all.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3: 6
Thanks be to God!
Proverbs 5,6 & 7 should be read and re-read often. You must continue to fight off lust. Adultery leads to down to death.
I've been very busy this past week and will continue to be very busy over the next few weeks. Thanks be to God for keeping me busy enough to stay away from the computer, but not busy enough to stop reading His word.
May love and faithfulness never leave, may they dwell in my heart forever. Trust in the Lord.
Thanks be to God!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D
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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 8, 2007 18:18:11 GMT -5
8/5 (1), 8/6 (1), 8/7 (1), 8/8 (1) Still feeling very strong, man it feels great. I don't want to lose this feeling. Still staying very busy and will continue to be busy for a while now.
As I look back I've had several good weeks, 7/18 was the last day that I had a lot of tempting thoughts. I hope that I've turned a corner in my recovery. I'll continue to stay aware of the warning signs and fight the good fight.
Staying strong until the end!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024 ;D
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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 11, 2007 20:11:09 GMT -5
8/9 (1), 8/10 (1), 8/11 (1) Still feeling strong. Thanks be to God! I know that my open communication with God has given me the strength to stay on the right path to my recovery. I can tell that my perception of women is changing, I don't look at other women the way that I use to. I'm gaining control of my lust. I don't think about P and I don't want to view P. God has open a door in my life and I'm walking through that door way.
Life is great! I don't want to go back to my old behaviors and false perceptions. Life is too short, I may not be here next week? Who knows? I'm going to enjoy the life that God wants me to live. Thanks be to God!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by Valjean on Aug 12, 2007 7:41:57 GMT -5
That's so true, and it's too easy to forget that sometimes. I do enjoy reading your journal, you have a lot of strength and positivity - it really rubs off. I'm glad to see you doing well So excited for you and your wife at the moment! Valjean
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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 16, 2007 18:51:19 GMT -5
8/12 (1), 8/13 (1), 8/14 (1), 8/15 (1), 8/16 (2)
Still feeling strong and staying very busy. I don't have much time to come on line and post in my journal and check on members of the support board.
I'm doing much better at keeping control of my lust. I haven't been thinking about P. I've had a few strange dreams the past week or so but nothing that has lead me back to P. I spend time every day reading and praying. I'm trying to keep an open line of communication with God. This has been a great help in my recovery.
Thanks for the kind words Valjean, it's always good to hear from you my friend. Take care of your self.
I pray that we will all find strength in the Lord to help us in our recovery, I ask in Christ name. Amen.
Stay strong!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by wanttochange024 on Aug 19, 2007 13:49:20 GMT -5
8/17 (2), 8/18 (8), 8/19 (1) Had some tempting thoughts yesterday, not real sure what brought them on. Just my years of viewing P I guess. I still have these images in my mind from all the filth that I've viewed. I try to find an activity to do when these thoughts come into my mind if I have trouble redirecting the thoughts. Oh well that was yesterday. I'm feeling good today and I'm looking forward to a great week.
Life has been so great over the past few weeks. I've been feeling very strong and not tempted by my thoughts much at all. I looking forward to not having any tempting thoughts in my life. Just good thoughts about where I'm going and how successful I'm going to be and how great this life truly can be. God has given us grace to live the life that he wants for us. I'm so grateful of that grace and I'm aware of the price that was paid for us all to have this grace. Leave the past in the past and move into the future with the love and grace that God has given us. Thanks be to God!
Think Good Thoughts!
wtc024
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Post by larus on Aug 20, 2007 2:36:42 GMT -5
hi wanttochange,
thanks for stopping by in my journal. I am glad to see you are doing well yourself. Yesterday your motto was in my head: think good thoughts.
Wishing you a good day Larus
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