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Post by tomlincolnsixecho on Dec 12, 2007 5:03:43 GMT -5
Great job getting through the urges, I have not been good with that lately, usually I get the urge, and I feel like I'm warping into a danger zone, I might get it a few times, then im gone, and finished. I like how you have summoned the strength to get around the terrible urges. Keep fighting, work on every day being clean.
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Post by fragile on Dec 12, 2007 11:47:56 GMT -5
I get around them on a regular basis because I don't worry about how many or how hard urges may come tomorrow, I summon my strength for today, not for the next couple days. Just trying to stay clean today. It works.
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Post by ItsTime on Dec 13, 2007 1:30:32 GMT -5
I thing I think about is how disappointed I feel when I have to begin at the beginning, you are doing great.
God Bless Itstime
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Post by ItsTime on Dec 13, 2007 1:31:29 GMT -5
.... and that is one thing that helps me get through the urges.
I forgot to put that part.
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Post by fragile on Dec 14, 2007 2:27:11 GMT -5
December 14, 2007 Word on. That's all I could say. I've been having some really good days, but today sucks as of now. No, I didn't slip, didn't even have urges. Well, I guess I can look forward to a good tomorrow, or else, not so good.
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Post by ItsTime on Dec 14, 2007 3:58:28 GMT -5
Remember the many blessings that you have, that always makes me enjoy a day more. Even if things are not going the best when I remember how blessed I am it makes my day.
God Bless Itstime
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Post by fragile on Dec 14, 2007 4:01:34 GMT -5
Yes, blessings are there, and I try enjoying all of them... Sometimes, life just has you in a hole, and well, you can still like your life, and like yourself, if you choose to. I'll choose to be happy, however hard it may be now.
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Post by ItsTime on Dec 14, 2007 4:03:14 GMT -5
Good choice There are many victories in front of you, it is the battles to get there that suck.
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Post by fragile on Dec 15, 2007 4:53:31 GMT -5
December 15, 1007 Oh my goodness, it's getting tough... There's this one image that I'm REALLY craving to see, but I know it's a no-zone... I actually had thoughts like: "come on, just once... find it, look at it, and then forget about it." But, I know that if I'm to find it, I'll have to look through probably thousands of different images. It's stuck in my head, and I can't do much to get it out. I really, really need God's help right now. It's not going too good in terms of urges. Although urges have pretty much been absent for the whole day, but it's now that I'm craving it... Of course, I have my laptop in my hand and it's 3AM.. I'm online to do my SCF course, and NO, I'm not going to look at it. I don't care how my body responds to it, I'm NOT LOOKING AT IT!!! Sorry for the vent... there, I'm done. Now: today was a pretty good day. Although yesterday kinda dropped me to an all-time low, today, after A LOT of sleep, I got up, without any anxiety, went to the gym and had a good workout, after which I'm basically a vegetable went to practice for Christmas performance with the orchestra, and then the youth band practice. It was a fun day, and I just returned an hour ago, hence, me being up so late, because I still had to take a shower. Still clean, and it's not changing no matter the craves and the fits... Though I may sound strong, I ask that if anyone here who shares my faith in Jesus Christ wants to pray for me, it'd be awesome. I need every bit of spiritual support I can get. Thanks! God Bless!
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chad32
Full Member
Becoming pure again...
Posts: 117
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Post by chad32 on Dec 15, 2007 17:40:07 GMT -5
Hi fragile,
I'm praying for you, that God helps you overcome your temptations. I'm very much in the same situation as you, and I have some verses from Proverbs which keep coming to mind and I thought they might help you:
In Proverbs 5 and 6, the Teacher is warning against adultery and the adultress, but I guess the same principle applies for P and lusting after images of the adultress/prostitute:
Proverbs 6.25-26, "Do not lust in your heart in your heart after her beauty, or let her captivate you with her eyes, for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adultress preys upon your very life."
[my note - the most powerful P images I have seen were not the most explicit, but the ones where the model has "captivated me with her eyes" - but it's a trap - RUN AWAY!].
Proverbs 5.8, "Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house."
This second verse is the most memorable for me. For me, "the door of her house" is the newsagent which sells soft P magazines/newpapers, or the internet adverts, or certain TV shows.
Fragile - keep on a path which is far away from P, and do not go near the door of her house!
If you find this useful, I highly recommend reading through the whole of Proverbs chapters 1-9, as there is loads more there. I love the way it is written from the perspective of a wise old teacher speaking to a "young man". It's all about "how can a young man keep his way pure".
God bless, Chad
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Post by fragile on Dec 16, 2007 3:10:51 GMT -5
December 16, 2007
Ok... New day, but the previous was filled with urges, out-of-the-blue erections, and bleh... a wet dream... I saw that coming because of the night before that with the urges. I guess those urges got carried away into my sleep, and well, at about 5 am I woke up in cold sweat and a wet dream. I'm glad the image is out was out of my head.
New day. I hope I don't have to deal with another one of those this night.
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Post by fragile on Dec 16, 2007 20:31:46 GMT -5
Had a hard time staying focused in Church today. Lots of urges and memories. Tried pushing them away, but that took a lot of work, and at first didn't work so well. Missed a lot of what was said by who preached Went out to eat with my bro and a couple of friends... stuffed, and tired. Going to skip evening service, and hopefully I'll be more alert than three weeks ago, when I did the same thing and had a major p session...
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Post by fragile on Dec 17, 2007 1:46:38 GMT -5
OH, Gee... I almost lost it just now... I had p just a click away, but stopped... now, I have to control myself carefully.
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Post by fragile on Dec 17, 2007 2:45:19 GMT -5
December 17, 2007
Well, the "skipping church" from three weeks ago could've repeated today... Glad it didn't. I've had urges all day, and really got close to p again... Didn't bite. Never will. (hopefully) My will is stronger than my sexual desire. And I believe that I am free, even though it still calls me, and lures me, and tempts me. I gotta worry about mb'ing. I'm really close, and since I've been almost three weeks into abstinence, it's really hard to control the urges. Yet, I'm strong... I've said no before, I'll say no again, and yes, I will still stay clean for today... just for today.
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Post by seward on Dec 17, 2007 3:00:32 GMT -5
Hi fragile, good to read your postings. I am Christian my self and understand some of your feelings. HA, it made me laugh you thinking about images during church, but laugh in a good way. I am very depressed and MB today after church, while thinking of the images all during the service.
Your honesty made me have a relaxing laugh and realize that I am not the only one who has thought of sex during church. I will pray for you and am proud of you for the three weeks, I haven't lasted over a week for years, so I will see how this plan works. I am willing to try.
God bless ya, a brother in Christ
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