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Post by Mayberry on Dec 9, 2007 7:15:14 GMT -5
I have just heard from our secret judge, who has chosen the winning poems. But, before I crown the winners with their (dubiously earned) laurels, here are three of my favorites that didn't quite fit the theme: Mayberry's favorite off-topic limerick: by spinners (reply #35) Porn addiction has not gotten its due from the medical science researching crew they spend funds exotic on nicotine and narcotics while we languish in an internet zoo Mayberry's favorite sweet limerick: by peacebewithyou (reply #67) I came to no-porn for relief To free me and my family from grief By the Grace of the Lord I came to this board Where recovery is our belief Mayberry's favorite "See the light" limerick: by breakingfree (reply #79) There once was an addict who lived on Denial He loved to float down it in style Finally, one day he did say There has to be a better way I think I'll try honesty for awhile
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Post by Mayberry on Dec 9, 2007 7:22:20 GMT -5
Drum roll, please! The secret judge has spoken, and the judge's choices are......... 1. The "best" recovery-based limerick. ulysses: Reply #29
I once was a man who had acted as if nobody else was impacted by the filth and derision that assaulted my vision now I see that my soul's been subtracted 2. The "worst" recovery-based limerick.There's a tie: Charlie: Reply #92c
There was a young woman named Iris Whose computer had a nasty virus “If he’s been surfing smut I’m going to cut off a nut!” She muttered as she tested for sharpness. blackspiral: reply #15a
There once was a young man called Billy, Who thought porn recovery silly. But he soon changed his mind When he drove himself blind After yanking all night on his willy. 3. The "best" off-topic limerick. dazednconfused: Reply #41
there once were some guys on no-porn who's limericks were making some mourn their battle of wits helped them call "quits!" and stopped them from tooting their horn
4. The "best" chest-beating (boasting) limerick.cammy: Reply #52
BF and CV, Were rhymin a spree, Of poems that had little to proffer, Cammy wrote one, Clearly he had won, As dat boy had sommin to offer!
5. The "best" gives you reason to WANT to recover, while not just being about recovery limerick.1dayatatime: Reply #75
Recover, recover, recover! Do it and you will discover. It purges the dread, Then clears up your head, And makes you a much better lover!
A donation will be made in honor of each of these writers this morning. Thank you all for participating in this bit of tomfoolery and, to quote 1dayatatime: Recover, recover, recover!
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Post by Webmaster on Dec 9, 2007 7:37:41 GMT -5
Thank you for this entertaining thread. I wish to acknowledge the sizeable donation that was made in the name of each of these "winners." I'm very grateful for the support each members gives to this site, those who donate and those who can't; those who rhyme and those who shant. - Wes
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 9, 2007 9:11:12 GMT -5
My congratulation to all the winners and a thanks to all who contributed to this thread. I have had more fun than a barrel of monkeys the past few days.
Mrs. BF will attest I still go to bed and wake up rhyming and we both get the giggles rhyming and punning off each other. Recovery doesn't' ALWAYS have to be dark and dreary.
And again I would like to thank Mayberry for coming up with this and giving us the opportunity to get to know some sides of each not previously known(not sure if that is a good thing in SOME cases LOL).
And a special thanks to Wes and the MODS for giving us enough slack to be our silly and often completely off topic and crude selves(well, except maybe for that Tiger , who SOME feel was somewhat excessive to SOME of the members withe the editing button).
BTW, I was cranky all day yesterday. I thoroughly believe I was going through limerick withdrawals, which apparently can be worse than P withdrawal for bring out the cranky monkey in me.
Yours,, bf
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ulysses
New Member
Today's lesson: compassion
Posts: 36
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Post by ulysses on Dec 10, 2007 6:53:35 GMT -5
Thanks, Mayberry, this was a ton of fun. My wife and I awaited the judging eagerly and shared our thoughts on the best and the worst. It is an honor to have traded rhymes (or in my case, rhyme) with this elite literary ensemble.
Ulysses
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ulysses
New Member
Today's lesson: compassion
Posts: 36
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Post by ulysses on Dec 10, 2007 7:06:48 GMT -5
I just have to point out a few notables. I was particularly fond of two limericks that took a sharp left turn at the end and just made me hurt myself laughing:
black spiral's:
A young porn addict didn't believe That his wife would just get up and leave. One year later he met her, Said "I'm doing better!" "So'm I," she said. "I married Steve."
And BF's entry:
In the tiny town of Pilth There lived a man so addicted to filth That all day his pulled his gun Desperately searching for fun But in the end he shot himself and was kilth
The one that touched me most was from my wife, beginagain, who gave me some elegantly worded support for my efforts over the past year:
I have a spouse in recovery who is finally able to see me His progress is slow and maddeningly so but at least he is here willingly
Thank you to all for entertainment, encouragement and enrichment.
Ulysses
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Post by 1dayatatime on Dec 10, 2007 11:59:25 GMT -5
Congratulations to ulysses. And thanks for the award.
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Post by hurtandlonely on Dec 10, 2007 12:21:04 GMT -5
There once was a man who watched P*rn, the day after his daughter was born the wife saw it and flipped, grabbed the scissors and snipped and the offending part was well-shorn
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Post by tiger1m on Dec 10, 2007 15:57:13 GMT -5
And a special thanks to Wes and the MODS for giving us enough slack to be our silly and often completely off topic and crude selves(well, except maybe for that Tiger , who SOME feel was somewhat excessive to SOME of the members withe the editing button). bf Special Awards CategoriesAward for sucking up to webmaster goes to: breakingfree Award for blantly daring someone to edit them goes to: breakingfree Award for most off topic posts in her own thread goes to: mayberry Award for causing the most PAs to shudder and grimace goes to: late entry at 12:21 hurtandlonely Award for most gracious loser goes to: there is no winner in this category. Recovery is about winning. There are no losers here.
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 10, 2007 16:38:14 GMT -5
I will gladly accept both my Tiger awards and I would like to say,
(Tiger Edit)
bf
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Post by Curious Voyager on Dec 10, 2007 16:58:42 GMT -5
I still think it was rigged and (deleted)
« Last Edit: Today at 4:58pm by breakingfree »
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Post by neverending on Dec 10, 2007 18:17:11 GMT -5
LOL! You guys are downright silly.
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Post by BlackSpiral on Dec 10, 2007 19:34:39 GMT -5
Do I get a "Worst Limerick of 2007" hat now?
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Post by Mayberry on Dec 11, 2007 6:59:32 GMT -5
BlackSpiral: The hats are on (eternal) back order, I'm afraid, due to such high demand. But wouldn't it look stunning in your signature line (well, the award, not the hat!)? J
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Post by Charlie on Dec 11, 2007 10:58:31 GMT -5
Hey,
As BlackSpiral and I tied, do we each get a nonexistent hat? Or do we have to split it in half?
Thanks everyone - this was fun and I have discovered an unexpected and terrifying talent.
-Charlie
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