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Post by Charlie on Dec 7, 2007 10:23:54 GMT -5
I always HATED poetry assignments in school. I couldn't string together a reasonable set of sentences with a rhyme scheme to save my life.
So i stopped trying. With very little rhyme and absolutely no reason at all, my contributions:
There once was an addict named Hugh Who liked to crap in his wife’s shoe But when he said “no, that’s a toad” She said “hit the road” Please don’t let this happen to you!
Curious, a voyager came to no-porn And chose to stop yanking his horn Recovery his light It burns very bright Illuminating a great ape reborn
There was a young woman named Iris Whose computer had a nasty virus “If he’s been surfing smut I’m going to cut off a nut!” She muttered as she tested for sharpness.
-Charlie (who would like to consider himself in the running for the coveted no-porn limericks last place award)
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cammy
Full Member
Posts: 221
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Post by cammy on Dec 7, 2007 10:35:22 GMT -5
I like the last one. Dat be funny. I see a kind apocalypse now vacant stare in SO LOL
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 7, 2007 10:41:31 GMT -5
Hah!! Methinks we have a lurker here, Charlie, hiding, waiting to pounce near the end of the competition, now that we have grown lazy and complacent.
I must say to all three of your LATE entries:
WHOOH BOY!! THEMS WAS SOME GOODUNS!!
bf
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Post by Curious Voyager on Dec 7, 2007 12:16:46 GMT -5
I have it on good authority that breakingfree used his political influence and had the CIA threaten Wes so he would suspend me just long enough for BF to win.
Mayberry I am lodging a formal protest.
it was rigged from the start and BF sure did his part to capture the rhyming crown as he took the great ape down who played his role as affable clown
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 7, 2007 12:18:34 GMT -5
Don't even ask out of what deep, dark recesses in my psyche I dredged this one (Jungian archetype?) did cavemen limerick?
There was a man from Rankin All day long his monkey he was spankin' He beat it so much It was sore to the touch Till one day he said, "I'm done crankin'"
(my apologies to cv for the monkey reference)
bf
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Post by Mayberry on Dec 7, 2007 12:22:05 GMT -5
To Curious Voyager: Off topic to the off topic thread Your protest has been observed, and though--at a glace--it's absurd (we think you are "wigging"-- -- *this contest* and *rigging* ?) we'll leave room for you to be heard. The Great Ape may now approach and give evidence that this contest has, in any way, been rigged. Full of digs? Perhaps. Started by a prig? Could be. Easier than trig? Most definitely. But RIGGED? RIGGED? ? Step forward and cite your authorities, sir, or be thou quiet.
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Post by Curious Voyager on Dec 7, 2007 12:33:06 GMT -5
Yippee, I'm back?
After consulting with my attorneys I have decided to take the last train out of Dodge.
With all good grace punishment I did face but from my end of the rink the whole contest did stink all this from the penalty box
I vote for mayberry and her lightening quick wit her fingers flying the keyboard hit defter and faster than was ever seen by this our new NP lymerick queen
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Post by Mayberry on Dec 7, 2007 12:44:17 GMT -5
Though the offer of queendom's enticing, on the whole, it remains uninviting. I send you my thanks, but prefer to play pranks and get others to do all the writing! Now, back to our regularly scheduled limerick contest.
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 7, 2007 12:48:12 GMT -5
In memory of
Mr. Yippee, I'm back IMO, that boy was offtrack Some thought him sad Many others he made mad IMO, he should recover
(tiger knows)
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Post by Charlie on Dec 7, 2007 12:50:27 GMT -5
WHOOH BOY!! THEMS WAS SOME GOODUNS!! Oh wow, *blush* I do blieve i've exhausted my daily dose of rhyme though. I see a kind apocalypse now vacant stare in SO LOL It was sort of inspired by those new "Sweeny Todd" movie trailers. More the crazycreepy intensity. But I can see vacant too. thanks -Charlie
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 7, 2007 12:58:53 GMT -5
I think my rhyming may be done Apparently I have had too much fun The Mods think I'm off topic I don't want to go to the Tropic banished with the monkey in the sun
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Post by cindyandben on Dec 7, 2007 13:17:35 GMT -5
The decidedly unprudish Cindy Also liked dancing the Lindy. But her mate M'd to Porn from midnight till morn... He missed out on a lot, now didn't he?
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Post by breakingfree on Dec 7, 2007 21:26:47 GMT -5
Okay, I know I know I went sulkily off to my room after justifiably having my limerick edited. Mrs. BF will confirm I ALWAYS HAVE TO GET THE LAST WORD IN. So here is one more, most likely the last unless I think very fast, but truly I fear the Mods to come here and send me off to sulk in my beer.
AS the contest draws near I hope many a chuckle you've found here Let us raise our glasses in a toast To our esteemed host Mrs. Mayberry whom we hold dear
bf
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Post by Mayberry on Dec 8, 2007 8:15:57 GMT -5
And that, boys & girls, concludes our first (and, we pray, last) RECOVERY LIMERICK CONTEST. A secret judge has come forward, and is reading through your entries this weekend.
Prizes will be awarded in the following categories: 1. The "best" recovery-based limerick. 2. The "worst" recovery-based limerick. 3. The "best" off-topic limerick. 4. The "best" chest-beating (boasting) limerick. 5. The "best" gives you reason to WANT to recover, while not just being about recovery limerick.
Results should be posted by Monday! Thanks to all who participated in this little bout of chaotic composition; I hope you each & all felt like the winners you are--in the battle to recover from addiction with humor, grace and love! This has been a treat, and I appreciate those, from both sides of the recovery dynamic, who played along. Now, back to the serious stuff. J
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Post by completelydone on Dec 9, 2007 5:22:13 GMT -5
THat was fun to read. I like poems. Can't wait to see who won!
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