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Post by dazednconfused on May 16, 2007 18:35:50 GMT -5
last post from daisy was....... am I seeing this correctly?? Yep, it was on April 27. I seem to recall SOMEONE calling me out after a mere week of absence. Seriously, I hope all is well with you and your family Well deserved I haven't been on the computer much lately unless for work. End of school is a bear and then being a mom with that has little time for anything else lately. Oh, if I can keep my eyes open... I am pooped. I did read "the five languages of love" It was very interesting. Two things jumped out at me and then my husband. My primary love language is his secondary love language. AND his primary love language is my secondary love language. It really makes us quite compatible. Also, he is beginning to see that part of the roots of his addiciton and struggle are based in his love language being physical touch and growing up in a family where he was truly deprived of that often, especially from his dad. I never realized just how much we "touch" each other on a daily basis. Of course, it is so much better than if he were touching himself ;D (hee hee hee). Seriously, it was interesting if not earth shattering information. I am interested to know the love languages of my kids... I think the one we struggle with the most has a love language that is "foriegn" to either of us. Maybe, maybe not. He is still working through different things. We saw his parents a couple of weeks ago and we have to go see them again this weekend... family obligations and all that. My recovery is going well. I have been feeling very needy lately, but I think that s due to 1) his stress level and 2) my hormones. between the work and the family stuff, he is really strssed out. We have decrease physical touch because he doesn't want to "use" me for comfort in an unhealthy way. I understand and respect that, but i could use a little physical reassurance. Add to that the inability to stay awake Oh well, it really isn;t as bad as it seems on paper. And this hormone surge too will pass. Also, I KNOW it si hormones because of the other bodily changes going on with it... of which listing falls into TMI. peace
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Post by johannes3 on May 16, 2007 23:35:53 GMT -5
Wow. That struck a deep chord with me. Something similar happened to me. (Though I don't know what my primary love language is, well, actually it might be.....words?)
Thanks for sharing this, daisy.
Let's all recover.
Johannes
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Post by hopeless on May 17, 2007 10:07:23 GMT -5
I know you must be exhausted daisy. I don't know how you keep up with everything. I hope the hormones level out soon. You know, you really do amaze me. You see this PA for what it is, even though it has hurt you deeply, you manage to rise above it and see it for what it really is. I sense an understanding in you. It's kinda like you are aware of something that I'm trying to grasp. I get that feeling about a few others here as well. They know something that hasn't dawned on me yet. You are a tower of inner strength even though you are so tired and you have so much on you. I thank you for sharing your journey. and thank you for checking in
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Post by dazednconfused on May 30, 2007 21:31:04 GMT -5
Thanks Hopeless and Johannes... Hey Johannes... how is the move going? Things here are good. I still get that shoe falling feeling every one in a while, but I think it really may be hormones... or atleast non-addiction related. H is slipping into the "evasion" pattern again.. ask a simple question, get a conveluted answer that may or maynot address the question. Not lying, jusst not direct. I am figuring it is both his stress level (to return to old habits) and my oversensitivity to stuff. I mean really, even my students rolling their eyes and acting like 12/13 year olds is starting to annoy me... like jees, what do I expect, they are 12/13 year olds. Maybe I just need sleep. I think what I really need is a day off from everything... being wife, mom, teacher, minister, referee, recovering, greiving, etc... Just a day to sleep in a hammock and not have to "be" anything but a child of God... ah well.... I am not the first nor the last to make such a wish. I am also worried about h... I don;t know if he has seen the news yet but another priest has been arrested nearby for molestation and cp. It is always a crap shoot with nrews like that. And then add to it the possibility of is parents visiting again this weekend... ahh well. I wonder if after he tells them about his addiction (he has said he thinks it is time) what their response will be. They are certainly full of surprises lately. Musings for another post... too friggin' tired to muse anymore tonight
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Post by hopeless on Jun 4, 2007 8:45:25 GMT -5
Hey daisy Good to see you. If his parents visited, I hope it went well. Wouldn't that day off be nice? I wish I could give you that day. You could just breathe, and not "be" anything.
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Post by LookingUp on Jun 4, 2007 17:01:33 GMT -5
If your in-laws visited, I hope you had a good visit and they let you have time to kick your feet back and waited on you hand and foot! In a few years, you'll have an empty nest and then you'll wish you didn't have so much time to put your feet up - that spare time gives minds too much time to think. Wanna' send your kiddos up here for a week or two? Johannes, there's more information on love languages at www.fivelovelanguages.comLookingUp
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Post by dazednconfused on Jun 5, 2007 19:55:57 GMT -5
Song for the day...
MercyMe - Bring The Rain From the album Coming Up To Breathe
I can count a million times People asking me how I Can praise You with all that I've gone through
The question just amazes me Can circumstances possibly Change who I forever am in You
Maybe since my life was changed Long before these rainy days It's never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you oh Lord My only shelter from the storms But instead I draw closer through these times
So I pray
Chorus: Bring me joy, bring me peace Bring the chance to be free Bring me anything that brings You glory And I know there'll be days When this life brings me pain But if that's what it takes to praise You Jesus Bring the Rain
I am Yours regardless of The dark clouds that may loom above Because You are much greater than my pain
You who made a way for me By suffering Your destiny So tell me what's a little rain
So I pray
Chorus:
(Repeats) Holy, Holy, Holy Is the Lord God Almighty
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Post by dazednconfused on Jun 5, 2007 20:04:18 GMT -5
Boy, I really love that song. And it is so much less depresing than "Homesick" I have been pretty high on the grief scale lately. I have really just been missing the possibility of who the baby was going to be. I know I am expecting another, but as I said to one of the addicts recently.. a new person doesn't fill the place of the one you lost, they fill their own new place in your life. MIL/FIL coming was pretty good. Unexpected. They have had a rough month and I almost think their own struggles has made my FIL realize he has so many blessings and it is damn well time he recognize them. Not only did they come down, but he actually let the kids clamour up on his lap to talk (unprecedented) and the last time we saw them, he took some of the kids fishing. He is actually letting them bond with him AND trying to spend time with them. Incredible. I asked my husband if it was painful for him with his dad doing things for his children he never did for him, but he said no. he is glad his father is finally recognizing grace in his life. LU and Hope- I am just pooped. A break would be good, but I will miss them terribly when they are gone. When we are away from them, I can't stand it- most of the time. Recovery going well for oth. Stress levels are high at work for both, which really does hinder our communication, but we are trying to be pro-active about it. I am napping during the day so I can stay up later to "chat" when he gets home. When I hit the insomnia stage of pregnancy (soon, I believe) he will probably have too much of me Peace and prayers all
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Post by hopeless on Jun 6, 2007 9:33:37 GMT -5
I'm glad it went so surprisingly well with the inlaws. That's always good. I have been pretty high on the grief scale lately. I have really just been missing the possibility of who the baby was going to be. I know I am expecting another, but as I said to one of the addicts recently.. a new person doesn't fill the place of the one you lost, they fill their own new place in your life. I don't know what to say here because I can't imagine that pain. Just know you're in my prayers. Great song you listed there
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Post by hopeless on Jun 7, 2007 8:09:15 GMT -5
...... I see you trying to let this liljournal slip back again. I don't think so missy. I'm bumping it back to PAGE 1
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Post by dazednconfused on Jun 7, 2007 21:09:31 GMT -5
Hey Hope- ok, we'll let it come back to page one. It is just a really busy time at work right now, and the end of school with kids is a right old pain too. You just don't have anything stay routine this time of year. Recovery is... what it is I guess. I have so little brain power to think about it. I was really wondering about what attracts some people to p and others not. I wonder if some are drawn to objectifying others in their lives because they themselves have been objectified at crucial times (like as a teen ager). I don't know. But I am not obsessing about it either, which is good. peace all
ps Johannes, I know I haven't peaked into your journal in a while, but I also notice that niether have you....
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Post by hopeless on Jun 21, 2007 16:26:12 GMT -5
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Post by hopeless on Jun 21, 2007 16:27:43 GMT -5
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Post by hopeless on Jun 21, 2007 16:34:32 GMT -5
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Post by hopeless on Jun 21, 2007 16:38:40 GMT -5
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