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Post by straightpepperdiet on Dec 12, 2007 16:14:24 GMT -5
I'm looking forward to being clean on Christmas.
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Post by slamdunk on Dec 12, 2007 18:01:43 GMT -5
I keep a notebook by my bed, and often jot down any thoughts I have with regards to p & mb, and the whole process of recovery. Sometimes quotes from the book I'm reading, or Bible verses, or ideas of my own.
Here's what I wrote last night:
THE LIE 'A p-free December is totally unrealistic, slam. You've done well to make it to 11 days; you deserve a treat. Just act out now, just this once, and I promise I'll make it easier on you for the rest of December. Then you can say one slip in a month, or roughly one every 15 days, and that's good enough.'
THE TRUTH Choosing to slip now will make the rest of December HARDER, not easier. I got about eight days into my 'p-free november' before slipping, and it basically wrote off the rest of the month because The Voice kept coming back and saying 'to hell with November, you've ruined it now anyway.' The truth is that choosing to abstain this night, 11th Dec, will actually make it EASIER to get through the rest of December p-free. As the distance towards the goal (31st Dec) decreases, the cause for celebration (=number of days clean so far) will increase. It is therefore easier*, and more worthwhile, to hang on.
(*- easier ment here in the sense of the 'bigger picture'.)
People I am glad to say that that is the choice I made last night. Every time you hear The Voice, chances are it is lying so you may find it helpful to write it out, and then write out a counter-acting truth.
Stay strong, slam.
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Post by rst123 on Dec 12, 2007 20:21:58 GMT -5
Still going strong. With each passing day, it seems that I come to resent porn more and more and have less of an urge to view it. By the grace of God, I will never view it again.
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Post by straightpepperdiet on Dec 13, 2007 12:41:04 GMT -5
I'm checking in on day 3 and I feel grateful to be in the recovery process from p addiction.
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Post by nrobinson on Dec 13, 2007 13:07:40 GMT -5
Congrats SPD! Right here at 3 with you. Keep it going!
This having been my first time "really" trying to quit and only being 3 days into it, I haven't heard "The Voice" yet. The thought of losing my wife and children has been enough to keep it at bay. While I hate the uncertainty of not knowing the fate of my family, I fear the day I gain some insight into my future. Once I know whether my family will be gone or not, I'm sure "The Voice" will start presenting itself. And that's when my real test of will, faith, strength, and loyalty will begin.
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chad32
Full Member
Becoming pure again...
Posts: 117
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Post by chad32 on Dec 13, 2007 14:24:05 GMT -5
Well done guys - keep going. December 13 and I'm still going strong.
I like Slam's comments above, and would like to add a couple of quick ones of my own:
THE LIE P is harmless fun, I deserve to relax some times, it's unrealistic to think you can keep away from P indefinately. I LIKE P.
THE TRUTH P is vindictive, it doesn't care for me or accept me. It sucks me in and sucks the life out of me. It takes away my peace and makes me hide and lie. I HATE P - I HATE P.
NO P IN DECEMBER!!!
Keep going, Chad
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Post by googles on Dec 14, 2007 9:46:38 GMT -5
Role call. How many of us are making the entire December? Me = 14 days so far
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Post by straightpepperdiet on Dec 14, 2007 12:01:47 GMT -5
SPD here and checking in with 4 days!
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chad32
Full Member
Becoming pure again...
Posts: 117
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Post by chad32 on Dec 14, 2007 13:07:17 GMT -5
I'm here with the whole of December so far - and not giving up. 14 days so far! Only 11 days until Christmas!
Chad
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anew
Junior Member
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit." - Aristotle
Posts: 80
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Post by anew on Dec 14, 2007 16:17:20 GMT -5
I've been here for the whole of december and 21 days P/MB free in total behind me.
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Post by slamdunk on Dec 15, 2007 7:25:05 GMT -5
Gentlemen,
sadly I am going to have to revise my pledge, to "no more p in december."
The saddest thing about last night's episode is that I can hardly remember it (maybe just as well); was pretty drunk after an xmas party, so inhibitions were nowhere in sight.
Can't believe, after all the wisdom I've shared on this thread, I adhered to NONE of it last night.
Oh well I shall keep trying. Maybe I will add "no more binge drinking in December either" as a sub-clause.
Stay strong, (a very hungover) slam.
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chad32
Full Member
Becoming pure again...
Posts: 117
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Post by chad32 on Dec 15, 2007 9:46:40 GMT -5
Sorry to hear of your fall Slam. I guess all P addicts have had a lot of experience of saying one thing and then doing the opposite - goes with the territory of a secret addiction. As a suggestion - how about reading all of your recent posts and then commit to being clean for the rest of December, to be ready for a really great new year. I festive season without P will be so much more fun!
15 December, and I'm now 40 days free of P. Keep going everyone - it can be done!
Chad
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Post by unico on Dec 15, 2007 14:05:23 GMT -5
looking forward to completing this month and beyond. What is required of me is that i continue to exercise vigilance in my thoughts and behaviour.
take care everyone
unico
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Post by straightpepperdiet on Dec 15, 2007 22:18:52 GMT -5
I'm gonna have to revise my pledge too because I looked at internet p*rn this morning and it was around 9am but I haven't looked at any since. I'm gonna do my best to get thru the night so I can have 1 day clean tomorrow. The reason I slipped is because I wanted to and I knew that I could call someone or email someone but I decided not to. Next time when the urge is driving me nuts, I will call someone.
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chad32
Full Member
Becoming pure again...
Posts: 117
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Post by chad32 on Dec 16, 2007 10:51:24 GMT -5
Sorry hear of your fall SPD - best of luck with your revised pledge.
I'm still here and have a total of 41 days clean. Last night was real difficult - no temptation to look at P, but I was plagued by recalled images from past P experiences (even some which were about 15 years ago!). Just lying on my bed trying to get to sleep and having to fight off the images for about an hour!
Still going - I hope with time the images will darken!
Chad
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