Post by megan11 on Dec 8, 2007 18:07:02 GMT -5
I spent the whole night till 6:30am arguing with my H and hvaing him tell me to pack my crap and our kids crap and get out. He was at work, i told him fine and hing up on him. He called me back we continued, i hung up over and over again till he caved. He told me that its easier for him to be angry that any other emotion and to make me angry back just makes it easier. Easier for him as if he is angry he doesnt have to feel the guilt.
He doesnt talk like i have said a million other times here. I brought up the s3x issues and he didnt say anything. Well he told me last night that I was the one who started with the name calling and to be honest i may have been (thinking that it was what he likes) i really dont remember but it is a huge possibility.
He hasnt been doing what i wrote in my boundaries that i gave to him tuesday. Wed was an SAA meeting, and he didnt go, he went to work last night without his book. These were things i have in my boundaries and i had to once again REMIND HIM of that.
He came home from work at 7am and at 9am was at an SAA meeting. I have to say that i really do value SA's because he left there once again with alot of insight and words of wisdom as to "my wife left me and if you dont get your crap together it will be too late for you too" He is the youngest in his meeting and as my H said "he has alot of advantage to learn from the elders"
I also had to remind him that everything as far as his recovery has been handed to him on a silver platter. The therapist, books, webites, and SAA meeting were GIVEN to him from me as a gift. He also got some Prozac out of the deal!
Me, what has been handed to me? What do I HAVE to help me cope? I have this website and all of you. I reminded him that he hurt me and its his work to repair me, and he will only be able to do that by fixing himself. I also reminded him that i will not be waiting forever, 11 months is too long. I asked him to read my boundaries and to have them with him at all times. I also asked him if he could give me them? He said yes, i told him he is to start today. He doesnt have much longer.
I am tired and i feel bad saying this but i just cant wait for bedtime for my girls, i need some rest. And i am mad saying that because fighting with him and his issue has taken away a mentally fit mother for them for today. I really do need to start making myself a priority and him and his issues less of a priority for me.
I just want to add a big thank you to all of you here because if i didnt have you, i would have thought that i was crazy by now, and that i was the only one. I wish i were the only one just so all of you wouldnt have to feel like this but it does make me feel better knowing that i do have people i can talk too about this who 'know". Thank you all so much. I would hug you all if i could.
He doesnt talk like i have said a million other times here. I brought up the s3x issues and he didnt say anything. Well he told me last night that I was the one who started with the name calling and to be honest i may have been (thinking that it was what he likes) i really dont remember but it is a huge possibility.
He hasnt been doing what i wrote in my boundaries that i gave to him tuesday. Wed was an SAA meeting, and he didnt go, he went to work last night without his book. These were things i have in my boundaries and i had to once again REMIND HIM of that.
He came home from work at 7am and at 9am was at an SAA meeting. I have to say that i really do value SA's because he left there once again with alot of insight and words of wisdom as to "my wife left me and if you dont get your crap together it will be too late for you too" He is the youngest in his meeting and as my H said "he has alot of advantage to learn from the elders"
I also had to remind him that everything as far as his recovery has been handed to him on a silver platter. The therapist, books, webites, and SAA meeting were GIVEN to him from me as a gift. He also got some Prozac out of the deal!
Me, what has been handed to me? What do I HAVE to help me cope? I have this website and all of you. I reminded him that he hurt me and its his work to repair me, and he will only be able to do that by fixing himself. I also reminded him that i will not be waiting forever, 11 months is too long. I asked him to read my boundaries and to have them with him at all times. I also asked him if he could give me them? He said yes, i told him he is to start today. He doesnt have much longer.
I am tired and i feel bad saying this but i just cant wait for bedtime for my girls, i need some rest. And i am mad saying that because fighting with him and his issue has taken away a mentally fit mother for them for today. I really do need to start making myself a priority and him and his issues less of a priority for me.
I just want to add a big thank you to all of you here because if i didnt have you, i would have thought that i was crazy by now, and that i was the only one. I wish i were the only one just so all of you wouldnt have to feel like this but it does make me feel better knowing that i do have people i can talk too about this who 'know". Thank you all so much. I would hug you all if i could.
