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Post by pac2544 on Dec 25, 2007 20:04:10 GMT -5
Here is the really big problem for me. I can go a few weeks without porn if I am really busy or away from home and the computer. But I can't totally stay away from porn and MB. If I have a relationship with a woman and there is a sexual side to it, I don't care about porn for a while. But eventually I want to have the high that porn gives me because I can be so much more in control of my release. This has happened to me in every relationship I have ever had with a woman. I fear it will happen again. I think this is the biggest reason why I can't stop. I read a post where imtheoneincontrol says he is afraid of sex: lightwave.proboards48.com/index.cgi?board=addicts&action=display&thread=1197749596&page=1I can relate to his experience with being told to abstain from sex. Although I am not Catholic , my father was stern about keeping away from sex before marriage. Of course I didn't but I never really have been able to build a committed relationship with a woman. It is either sex or friendship. Not both. I live alone. I know I will stay alone if I keep using porn the way i do. I feel shame and I don't want to have another failed relationship because of porn. Maybe its my shame that really limits me. But I doubt any woman wants to compete with the porn models looks or performances. Its just not natural sexual behavior. Ah well, its Christmas and I jerked off and i feel sad. PAC2544
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