Getting rid of stuff?

[mo4wo1]

I used to have a pretty good collect from the time I was 13 or 14.

[trigger]I collected "Heavy Metal" magazines.[/trigger]

I still had them until a few months ago. I had been wanting to get rid of them for years but my H would regularly talk me out of it whenever I would voice my desire to do so.

One day, I just picked up the box & tossed them & then covered them with more garbage so my children would not see them.

H took it well, lol.

But what finally motivated me to do this was the fact that my oldest son had recently been caught viewing animated P. I had always known my mags were "adult" but then I felt like I never really looked at them that way, that I was just really into the art & stories.

It was hard to do but I just did it.

But now, today, I am accepting that I had my own P collection. That bothers me. I can't say I used them but I will say I got a rush. Wait . That's a contradiction. Talk about the power of denial.

Why am I morning them now, months later? I mean, I hadn't looked at them in a long time. Literally, I would only look through them either when we were rearranging the closets or moving. And the last few times I did look, I didn't enjoy it.

Weird.

[addict70]

I'm familiar with the magazine so yeah, I could understand your remorse about throwing them out, some very cool artwork in those, however being when I was a kid, that same magazine was in my pops garage happy box and it was some of the first P I ever got ahold of so I think you made the right decision. If I was your son I probably would have found them.

You should have teken them to a comic book store though. You'd have probably gotten a few bucks for em.

[chad32]

I think it is crucial to get rid of all P and triggering material out of your possesion, if you are serious about recovery.

I know some things are really cherished and hard to loose, but it just keeps tripping you up (well it did for me anyway).

I have deleted all images and videos from my computer, deleted all bookmarks, thrown away all magazines.

I even used to transfer P to my mobile phone so that I could view them secretly and safely in the bathroom - this was dramatically stopped when I dropped the phone in the toilet bowl!! The phone immediately ceased to work and has been dead ever since. It's a shame, as it was a great phone, however that "act of God" stopped my mobile phone P obsession in it's tracks! I don't have a memory card for my new phone, so no temptation there!

I wonder what other lengths other people have gone to to get rid of their "stuff"?

Chad

[davion2308]

I think getting rid of anything that creates or causes such an emotional, physical, or mental rush like satisfying an addiction will be painful. Even if it's NOT an addiction, one builds a strong relationship with things they use daily or things they like. I remember being in elementary school and getting upset when I had to throw out a toothbrush. It was something that I associated with my very existance.

P and non-p works the same way. You really like a pair of jeans, but they have holes you can't repair, they're really old and nasty, and they need to be trashed. You hate to do it because they're YOURS.

I have deleted entire caches of P during various bouts of "Get Rid of Everything." It hurt, because I had a dependancy.

Chad 32 had it right, it's cherished. Luckily, the only potential P I currently have is rated-R movies and DVDs, like horror movies and comedies. I don't really think of them as P, but they do have occasional nudity. It helps when there's no stash to fall back on.

Stay tough!