Post by backstabber on Dec 12, 2007 16:56:11 GMT -5
Hello to all fellow addicts!
I'm a male 23 year old from Serbia. I've been a p-addict for as long as I can remember. I discovered p as soon as I got those raging hormones, and I've been on it ever since.
Needless to say that the bloody thing took everything that was worth taking in my life.
I've joined this forum a year back, and since then I have tried at least a 100 times to control my unnatural urge towards p, but I did not start any journal or anything. I'm actually doing it this time. It's the last thing that I haven't tried, so I'm doing it!
Anyway I've mentioned how p affected my life horribly, and this is what I meant by it:
Sleepiness, no will to do anything other then sit or lye around, very very short memory, no way to keep my attention on anything, slow moves, cowardice, etc.
These are the things that effected myself directly, as I've noticed in my attempts to shake off the addiction until now. As long as I controlled myself these would fade away (well not entirely, but to a far reasonable level). When I get back to p, there they are again.
Off course much worse was the impact of my behavior on my surroundings, I am greatly sorry about it. If there was anything that I can do about it...
Anyway, the main problem is that while I'm under the effect of p, I'm living in a dream world. I have no connection to reality at all! I've come to a conclusion that I have a predisposition towards p unfortunately, and the p thing is having the same affect on me as any other drug would to another human being. This making me totally unable to act right in certain situations.
Anyway I'm here to FIGHT IT until me or the urge cease to exist. Either way I'm a winner!
I'm a male 23 year old from Serbia. I've been a p-addict for as long as I can remember. I discovered p as soon as I got those raging hormones, and I've been on it ever since.
Needless to say that the bloody thing took everything that was worth taking in my life.
I've joined this forum a year back, and since then I have tried at least a 100 times to control my unnatural urge towards p, but I did not start any journal or anything. I'm actually doing it this time. It's the last thing that I haven't tried, so I'm doing it!
Anyway I've mentioned how p affected my life horribly, and this is what I meant by it:
Sleepiness, no will to do anything other then sit or lye around, very very short memory, no way to keep my attention on anything, slow moves, cowardice, etc.
These are the things that effected myself directly, as I've noticed in my attempts to shake off the addiction until now. As long as I controlled myself these would fade away (well not entirely, but to a far reasonable level). When I get back to p, there they are again.
Off course much worse was the impact of my behavior on my surroundings, I am greatly sorry about it. If there was anything that I can do about it...
Anyway, the main problem is that while I'm under the effect of p, I'm living in a dream world. I have no connection to reality at all! I've come to a conclusion that I have a predisposition towards p unfortunately, and the p thing is having the same affect on me as any other drug would to another human being. This making me totally unable to act right in certain situations.
Anyway I'm here to FIGHT IT until me or the urge cease to exist. Either way I'm a winner!