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Post by facinglife on Jun 26, 2005 17:10:45 GMT -5
Wow. What a fast response from the moderators. Thank you thank you thank you.
I feel safe posting in this new forum.
I hope we can all return to working recovery.
Peace,
Johannes 05/30/05
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Post by maui on Jun 26, 2005 19:34:24 GMT -5
Thank you for this forum! It makes so much sense. I am so glad you've added it - as BlackSpiral said, it adds balance.
Best wishes all, and lets get to our work.
Maui
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Post by paradox on Jun 26, 2005 20:35:33 GMT -5
Personally, I see no difference. If anything, I'm a bit confused what to do where.
Why not make the old "Recovery Board" into the "Addict's Board" as it contains all of the old threads, especially the accountability groups.
Also, I know that I read the journals far less now that they are separated from the main board.
Finally, this does nothing to solve the problem of people making inappropriate input on "the wrong board." It's still a free-for-all.
Sorry to be so negative, but recent events have me in a very negative mood.
Reagardless, I wish you all peace.
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Post by Tom on Jun 26, 2005 21:20:08 GMT -5
Hi Folks, Umm, what exactly is this forum? I'm with paradox on this one. I'd rather there was one board for SAs and one for SOs. I don't get the purpose of the new forum. Can someone explain it to me? - Tom
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Post by Webmaster on Jun 26, 2005 21:28:07 GMT -5
This is a forum for SA's to post when they just want to converse with other addicts. At least that's what was requested.
Wes
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Post by Maddy on Jun 26, 2005 21:52:53 GMT -5
I don't think there is any way that we can completely keep non-addicts from posting on our threads. I mean, this is the internet. We could just lie. But this is a place where we can post without worrying about the SO's reading what we say. Not because what we say is a secret. But what we say can be extremely hurtful.
Now, I am not sure if we should have a forum for SA's, one for SO's, and one for both. BUT, I do think there has to be a place where we can post. And when someone says they have a "right" to soapbox on our threads because the forum is "open to all" then we can find solace in a place that is our own.
The SO's are constantly telling us that we need to stay of their board. And I agree with that. It isn't our place to post there unless they have welcomed us. And even then it is a dangerous dangerous place. They should be able to support each other without our two cents.
And we should be able to support each other without theirs. Not ALWAYS, but there are the occasions when SO advice is not what I want to hear.
I think this is a great idea, Wes. I respect any decision you make for this forum. If you want to keep only two forums (one for SA's and one for SO's), then that is fine too.
I mean, people are still going to crosstalk across the lines, but maybe a deeper line in the sand could offer some protection.
~Maddy
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yoyo
New Member
Posts: 9
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Post by yoyo on Jun 26, 2005 23:04:03 GMT -5
I am very new and not completely up to speed, but it makes sense that there be 3 boards, ours, theirs, and both. What prompted this change?
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Post by Ian on Jun 26, 2005 23:19:22 GMT -5
Just reporting for roll-call: I'm Ian, a sex/love/fantasy addict. I'm grateful to know that, after about 27 years of not knowing why I did the things I did, not being able to face how bad I felt about myself and my actions, and not knowing that there actually was help for someone like me.
I'm glad this space is here. Thank you, Wes.
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Post by silent and still on Jun 27, 2005 0:08:18 GMT -5
Maybe we could try and lay a couple of ground rules for this forum. Simple rules and stick them to the top of the board like the New Members thread on the Recovery Board. Simple rules like:
Addicts only No off topic threads Play Nice
Anybody else think this is a workable idea? Does anybody think this is necessary other than me?
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Post by Al on Jun 27, 2005 5:57:05 GMT -5
I was skeptical about the creation of this board yesterday but now that I see it in black and white, it makes a whole lot of sense. This board is for my day-to-day recovery work. I'll post milestones here. I'll talk about my feelings here. I'll get support about current personal issues from others who struggle. This board will be the first board I read when I log in. I would expect some SO's to read this board, but not all.
But sometimes I want to share something with a wider audience, when it is about porn addiction but isn't really about my personal recovery from it. For example, recently I posted that I was pleased Yahoo was banning some of its chat rooms. That sort of thing would go on the General Board. Controversial/heated discussions between SA's and SO's can go on the general board by default. I'll read the general board second.
I rarely post on the Partner's forum, but that's still permitted. SO's should rarely post on the Addict board, but it's still permitted. I am comfortable moderating the General board, the Addict board, and the Recovery Journals. I don't want to moderate the Partner's board.
Be well, Al
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Post by jeepnomore on Jun 27, 2005 12:18:06 GMT -5
I think that in time-this will be the forum of which the majority of us pa's will be posting.It may become a litlle clouded in initial stage-as to what is personal and what is general info-?ie.sometimes the posts have a little of both.Let's give it a try-although it may make the general board obsolete eventually-as I think we're splitting hairs here a little-? Nevertheless-I,m just thankful that we have a place to come to and I thank Wes for the opportunity and appreciate the time that Al has given as Moderator......keep up the good fight...-Jeepnomore
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beebz
New Member
Posts: 15
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Post by beebz on Jun 27, 2005 13:44:03 GMT -5
even though my SO is having problems on admitting he has a problem i am glad to see that forum was added. when i get home tonight i am going to tell him about this new forum and hopefully it will be of good use for him. sometimes i think that it is hard for him to tell me certain things because he just doesn't know what the reaction will be and i don't know about the rest of the SO but for me sometimes it is easier for me to go on this site and read what my other half is thinking and feeling. when i read it , i have time to put some stuff in perspective and instead of me freaking out or us getting into a huge fight we can be calm and talk about things. i think its a great idea that he has this place to go where he can read or post when it is just people that feel the same way he does.sorry if i offended anyone or some of you may think i have no place here but from all my mumbling i hope you all can understand what I'm trying to say.
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Post by maui on Jun 27, 2005 17:49:43 GMT -5
beebz,
It's good and refreshing to read you support for this new forum. Thanks!
Maui
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Post by Picacho on Jun 28, 2005 0:57:41 GMT -5
I am with Paradox and Tom on this one. I don't see how this will help people posting in the wrong forum. The people that have crossed those lines in the past will continue to do so in the future regardless of what ground rules are laid. The only way I see to keep things separate is to have a completely different board altogether for both SA's and SO's. As long as when we all log in and see the Recovery Board, SO's board and now the Addict's Board right next to one another, the people that want to cross the line will do so. Just my two cents.
Picacho
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Post by little knight on Jun 28, 2005 20:30:16 GMT -5
I truly hope that this new forum is a place where SA's can share their struggles without the fear of being attacked.
I humbly ask all people who read here to respect this place and understand that it is for us addicts. We need to get things off our chest - even if they are unpleasant.
Some of the things that we have to share come from the darkest corners of our minds and they may be disturbing. But they need to be said. This practice of rigorous honesty will help keep us sober.
God bless
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