|
Post by witness on Dec 21, 2007 5:39:01 GMT -5
Tom, I too have cried many times reading here. It is good to know that there is hope, that you can have a different life.
Just as you benefitted from reading what dazednconfused wrote here, go over to the Partners Forum and read my thread: My Wife And I/Putting Together the Pieces. I got lots of feedback from the ladies. They can help you too.
You can make it!
|
|
AmazingGrace
Full Member
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like ME.
Posts: 130
|
Post by AmazingGrace on Dec 22, 2007 2:39:37 GMT -5
TAC-- It sounds to me like you are in a place of brokenness and readiness to make a change. I'm glad to read everything you have to say. You're aware that p objectifies women. You know that it is not in line with what God wants for you. Please know that brokenness is the place where God can work with you. I found a scripture for you--Psalm 40. You may want to have some texts memorized to "pull out" when you are tempted. I figure "He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand" is pretty powerful. www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=23&chapter=40&version=31God knows how pit-dwelling torments our souls and draws us away from him. Fortunately, he also knows how to pull you out of the pit. My husband is currently at 2 1/2 months since his last "slip" and about four months into serious recovery. I, unfortunately, had to confront him and give him the choice between life with me and life with porn. I'm grateful he chose me, but it has been quite a journey. Your p & mb use is probably both a cause and a symptom of deeper issues in your life & marriage. My husband and I have used this opportunity to work on our marriage. We are in a place we had never yet experienced in our 12 year marriage. It's not perfect--even getting rid of p & mb doesn't guarantee that we always get along. But we're being more deliberate about regularly connecting with each other, both emotionally and physically. I would suggest getting "Love and Respect" as a marriage enrichment book. And speaking of getting out of a pit, Beth Moore's "Get out of That Pit" book has been very uplifting for me with my own addictive issues. I'm glad you're here.
|
|
tac
New Member
Posts: 16
|
Post by tac on Dec 22, 2007 10:10:23 GMT -5
After reading everyone's responses, and reading many of the other suggested post, especailly the one's from the spouses, here is my plan to overcome this....
1. Seek the prayers of the praying members of this message board as I seek repentance, forgiveness, and restoration. 2. Meet with my Christian brother and confess it to him. Pray with him and ask his prayers as I take the confession further. I have a friend now, and we meet each week for breakfast. Our next one is already scheduled for the Monday after Christmas. 3. Meet with my pastor and confess it to him. I will submit to whatever he says as far as teaching Sunday school. If he will allow me, I would like to continue, with proper accountability, and a promise that if I do not abstain 100% from P and MB, that I will immediately step down. 4. Get professional counsel. I will select a female so that if my wife needs and wants counseling there is already in place someone who knows my history. If she chooses another later, that’s fine, I just want to have one ready immediately. 5. Tell my wife all of the ugly truth. From my teenage years onto now. 6. Go before my Sunday school class, and confess it all to them. Ask for their forgiveness, for having a secret sin while teaching God’s Word publically. If they will allow me, and if the Pastor allows me, I will continue to teach, if not, I will step down. 7. As I seek repentance and forgiveness, I will continue messages on this board, continue professional counsel, and continue to trust in the Lord. The verse that the Lord has given me is… 1Jn 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” God’s Word is true, and He cannot lie.
(Man I’m so glad of that. At least there is one man who can be completely trusted) He says that if I confess, that He will not just forgive me, but that He will CLEANSE ME of ALL UNRIGHTEOUSNESS! I am going to take Him at His Word, and I am going to confess to everyone that I have wronged about this. First to God, which I have already done, and then to each person that I my sins have affected in any way. I know it will be hard, but God will cleanse me, I am confident, because He said He would.
Ladies and Brothers, please feel free to add any comments or suggestions as i am seekig all advice and prayers.
Tom
|
|