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Post by Curious Voyager on Dec 18, 2007 11:58:43 GMT -5
In either case, I think it's a huge mistake to examine their issue through the lens of an insulated community of porn and masturbation addicts. Dude I am going to call you on your crap. You post that you are 27, single, living at home unemployeeed, and your life sucks and you are calling US insulated.Wow man--you need to get a clue quick! Sit down, be quiet, you don't know what you're talking about! |
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Post by alyson on Dec 18, 2007 12:39:18 GMT -5
Im going to ignore you chasmjumper. You have made me cry. I forgive you and hope you have success with your issues, but i will not be following or seeing anything you have written.
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Post by Healing Rain on Dec 18, 2007 13:18:45 GMT -5
Either this Neil fellow knew he was marrying broken goods and held himself out as a white knight who would go along with this "I was abused" drama... or alyson, like so many wives before and after, was putting out until after the honeymoon, at which point she switched the wedding ring for a level 32 Vampiric Wedding Band of the Frigid Prude with a +4 drain life modifier... In the first scenario, Neil is getting what he deserves. In the second scenario, Neil is getting what's typical. In either case, I think it's a huge mistake to examine their issue through the lens of an insulated community of porn and masturbation addicts. Wow!! Are you kidding me? Broken goods? Where do you get off man? That was just absolutely uncalled for and cruel. So, are you actually Neil posting in disquise... I hope not, for Alyson's sake... Because you sure are taking quiet an interest in inflicting pain on her. Alyson and Neil's story actually fit rather well into the "Pa and SO" structure line. Fits with mine. I am an SO that is "broken goods" as you call it. My H was my saving grace, or so I thought. He was also a very active Porn and Masturbation addict from a very young age. Its a scenario I've seen played out here in story after story. The majority of us SO's have been damaged, sexually. And the majority of the PA's have been damaged, sexually. Its actually a common denominator linking us. It could be used, as you have used it, to inflict harm.... or it could be used for the basis of empathy... which I sincerely hope you develop in the near future. Belittling someone else's pain is not "helping" or giving advice. Its just simply belittling someone else's pain. And in reality says more about yourself than it does about Alyson or Niel's situation. So, if you are inclined to keep your true self to your self, then my advice is stop posting malicious, flaming, belittling, blame shifting, and arrogant posts. Because, we see through those to who you really are... A damaged person trying to strike out at others to make himself feel just a little bit better. But in reality, if you would like to feel just a little bit better.... go share your story honestly, and start moving forward instead of staying stuck in the mud of lashing out. ~~~~ Alyson... Hun, I am so sorry you are going through what you are going through. Please, don't let the "bad" thats happened on this forum keep you from posting and seeking help. Because there are many many more here that honestly, truly want to help you. And we do understand exactly where you are right now with all of this. Your story is very similar to mine. Very similar to many many many SO's on this forum. We are here to help you in anyway we can. If the PA's involvement in your threads get to be too much for you, post over in the Partner's section where you will receive almost exclusively SO responses. Sometimes, that safety is needed when we are in the early stages of discovery. Because, more pain is something us SO's don't need at this time... even pain from other sources such as angry PA's, like you've seen here. And we sure don't need anyone telling us what our situation is, and how we are over reacting. Because, you are the only one that can determine exactly what it is you are dealing with on the home front, and what amount of reaction is needed. Stay strong and true to yourself and your feelings here.... they are real and deserve validation. As for the normal sex drive... Compulsive Masturbation Hijacks the sex drive. It vamps it up... Basically, a compulsive Masturbator keeps himself always in a sexual high, never quiet coming down. They believe that they are this way normally, when in actuality it is the act of extreme Masturbation that makes them this way. A normal healthy sex drive does not run ones life, it is just another component of life, existing in balance with everything else... not the existence of. When sex (masturbation, Porn with or with out masturbation, acting out sexually in any form) becomes the focus of one's life... or the top focus of one's life... then there is issue. And, I am in full agreement that porn and Masturbation are both a form of adultery. Any sexual gratification outside of the marriage bed, for me, is infidelity. My heart goes out to you, Alyson. I know just what you are going through right now. I've been exactly where you are. I've been married for 12 years, have had 3 d-days, starting way back before we were married, and then again after 4 years, and then another 7 after that... July of 06. There has been no porn in my house for a year and a half... but Masturbation is the bigger evil in our situation. Because it is the root of my H's addiction. I do so completely relate to you, and am sorry you received some of the feedback that you did here. Please don't let it stop you from reaching out. We are here to help. My prayers are with you and your H. ~Rain~ |
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Post by alyson on Dec 18, 2007 13:56:37 GMT -5
Thank you so much rain.
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Post by LookingUp on Dec 18, 2007 14:06:40 GMT -5
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Post by alyson on Dec 18, 2007 14:13:03 GMT -5
Are those for me to read or Neil?
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Post by dazednconfused on Dec 18, 2007 14:19:49 GMT -5
alison-
Knowledge is power, so I'd say Both you and your h need to read as much about this addiction as possible. You need to know what you are looking at in terms of addiction and in terms of recovery (if he tries or if he doesn't)
Compulsive MB friggs up their natural balances, so his excuse that he has a higher sex drive is just that, an excuse.
((((((((((alison))))))))))
-dazed
ps: I am sorry some asscheese newbie was so hurtful. I am glad tiger shut him up though. Most times you will find great support here. If you need help with your recovery as an SO, journey into the partner's section. We are here to help
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Post by alyson on Dec 18, 2007 14:32:11 GMT -5
I appreciate you, I think he really thought he had that until I told him what you others told me. I believe he recognises the truth now.  |
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Post by hurtandlonely on Dec 18, 2007 15:48:00 GMT -5
Sounds like the ranting of a typical antisocial gamer. Pretty insulated if your only human interaction is with the other geeks playing World of Warcraft, hunh? Either this Neil fellow knew he was marrying broken goods and held himself out as a white knight who would go along with this "I was abused" drama... or alyson, like so many wives before and after, was putting out until after the honeymoon, at which point she switched the wedding ring for a level 32 Vampiric Wedding Band of the Frigid Prude with a +4 drain life modifier... In the first scenario, Neil is getting what he deserves. In the second scenario, Neil is getting what's typical. In either case, I think it's a huge mistake to examine their issue through the lens of an insulated community of porn and masturbation addicts. |
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Post by tiger1m on Dec 18, 2007 16:02:46 GMT -5
This well has run dry and I'm putting the lid on.
tiger
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Post by Webmaster on Dec 18, 2007 19:43:02 GMT -5
chasmjumper has been banned for flaming.
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